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IHanakoI

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okay, I'm married. But my heart was broken in the beginning of this week 'cause no answer is also an answer. My best friend, okay, now former best friend was away from our old town over night. And the most persons don't know where he went. Me, either.

Aber a while he said he lives a the other side of the country now, 1000 miles away. And said not why.

Last autumn, 7 days before my wedding, he said he would like to come - it was really unpolite to say it in such a short time, we had to organize a hotel room and so on ... and one day before the wedding he has written "okay, I can't come" without giving any reasons.
That was the most awful thing a best friend could do to me "I come ... no I don't come.... no matter if you have to pay the hotel room for me......" My other best friend come instead she was ill!!
So ...

And now he doesn't answer any messages but post some metal videos under a pregnant friends fb 'cause she said she had some trouble ..... i mean: WHAT THE H...!?!?! She war my high school friend but he doesn't know her - so why he is always online, posting some bullshit but can't answer any messages of me.

So I've quit this relationship and this hurts so much as I'm quitting a lovers relationship - 'cause this friendship lasts longer than any lover i'be had.
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Dear whatever your name ist,

I'm a little frustrated today. Maybe it's just 'cause of the grey sky above me. So I have to calm myself down with a shower and tidying up my room for my move to Hannover. Just start with select the things I need there.
But I'm in anger with these sort of guys they don't answer to important messages its. It's a disease of the digital world. When we don't get an answer in one or about a couple of hours, we're angry. Then, afer 2 or 3 days, we hate this guy.
I don't want to run around to get my things back. In future I wan't borrow everything ... first I'm naiv and then I got so much useless stress 'cause of other people untrustworthiness ...
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Being a trainee is nice but sometimes it's kind of disappointing that I don't earn much money to spend on my photography and painting stuff.
it's going on my nervs but I'm not that kind of girl that just wants a rich boyfriend to get all she ever wanted from the material world. I don't want a boyfriend who pays for me. I just want to earn it on my own (so it wasn't the best idea to change my way of career but I've realized that i couldn't become happy with the job I've had. And I really loved to work as a waitress - but I can't work the whole night ... so I think I will become a kind of office worker thingi).
Having a job that makes me happy and prove myself valuable is more important than just have money and be unhappy 'cause of something.
Why should I stay together witfh a guy who dissapointes me twice a week or make me unhappier than anyone?
I desearve to be happy.
I live for myself, not for others.
And so I don't want a guy who pays for me. One of my ex boyfriends always want to make me happy and paid instead I don't want it. In the end of the relationship he wanted all that money back. Crazy shit. No other way to express himself that he's unhappy with my desicion to left him?
Whatever.
I don't want that bullshit again. I'm adult and I wish that other people who are adult, too, would act like this.
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8 am in the morning, Friday. I'm just in the Pharell Williams Happy mood and just finished my sixties glamour makeup 'cause today I'll visit a gallery in Hamburg and go shopping afterwards. I upload a selfie at instagram. The light is not the best, it's before sunrise, but who cares? It's just a little fun selfie.
Then a comment says that the girl don't like that I don't smile so much at this pic.
Another one means she don't like it when people don't smile at pics.

Okay, what's this? Emotional censorship of members of social media?
Next time when I'm drunken, angry or crying, I will take tons of selfies.
Nobody should forced to smile or make a duckface 'cause everybody smiles or make a duckface.
embedded_item1421400776657 by IHanakoI
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upside down

1 min read
Yesterday I went to theatre, student theatre to help them. I don't know why, I had just too much freetime, I think 'cause instead of a nice "hI, how are you?" I got a "very nice": "oh, you've got a red coat, too. Mine looks better, yours look like shit." Okay .... my boyfriend loves that red coat, b*tch, so beware of him. You're are a lucky blond moroon 'cause my bf went to opera in Kassel this evening.
thop random sketch by IHanakoI
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